The Life and Times of the Church Nursery

I am all about taking my turn in the church nursery. But, it always seems that whenever my friend, Kelli, and I have nursery duty, we end the night thinking we've just had what must have been the worst night in nursery history. The last two times we've had duty, the nursery was out of Goldfish. Now, let me tell you, if there are no Goldfish, the 1, 2, and 3 year olds will literally ban together and revolt. My daughter is usually leading the charge. On those nights, we've been able to find some Ritz crackers and Saltines in the church pantry to hold these little ones over.

Last night was our turn again. We had plenty of Goldfish, so at least the night got off to a good start. To begin with, we handled lots of whining, crying, and generally wild kids. We had one little boy whose dad told us he was potty training but would let us know when he had to go. OK - we can handle that. So, about halfway through, he tells me he has to go. Well, I panic slightly, because I am not at all adept at handling anything "little boy." This is why God blessed me with a girl! But, this little guy pretty much handled everything by himself with some help from me getting his pants down and up. Whew!

So, later in the night during a moment of semi-calm, I look over at our little potty-training man and see him making "the face." Great. I say, "Um ... S, did you poop?" No need to ask - of course he did. Well, I guess because he is potty-training, his parents did not bother to bring any extra diapers. There are 10 minutes left before church is over, so we considered leaving him like he was until his parents came. However, the smell in the room was getting bbaaaaaaadddd ... so bad that one of the older kids said, "Hey! Somebody stinks!" So, we look around and find some diapers in a drawer that are probably 2 sizes too small for this kid, but they will have to do. Kelli bravely volunteered to change him since I took him to the potty earlier. We get out the gloves, the changing pad, and about 1000 wipes because we can smell how bad this is gonna be. I will save you all the details but I gagged twice during this whole process just standing there to help, and Kelli, who is almost 5 months pregnant, had to run out of the room halfway through because she was about to lose her lunch. Ohhhhhh the fun times we have in the nursery.

By the way, my Mother's Day was a great one. I got a new dress, new shoes, and new jewelry for church, got a pedicure, and a new mommy-book I have been wanting. I got to sleep in late, we picked up lunch so I wouldn't have to cook, I actually found time to sit and read an entire magazine, and everyone was able to take long naps after church. What a good day!